Don't just do something, sit there!

I've been thinking a lot about attachment.  I get so used to how things are that I find myself fighting change, even though I know everything is temporary.

Last year, I was doing work that I was good at and paid well.  It wasn't anything I wanted to do permanently, but it was helping to pay the bills.  Then suddenly, the work was over.  I was angry and concerned how I would make ends meet.  I was filled with questions and no answers. I felt like I needed to do something.

What I needed to do was nothing.  Eventually, I relaxed into what was already here.  I found acceptance and started to believe I was where I was for a reason.  I spent time just paying attention - to how I felt and to what was going on around me in each moment.

What I found was that I had been given a wonderful gift.  Enough space had been created in my life for me to consider what I really wanted to do, who I really wanted to be.  There were no more excuses that there was no time or energy to pursue my dream.

And that is just what I am doing now.  I am grateful for the path that has brought me to this moment.  I remember what one of my teachers says, "Don't just do something, sit there!"